Thursday, February 24, 2005

I'm so hurt.... life. Sometimes life can be so betraying. The wonderful moments you share with others just to get smacked in the face by circumstances that no one will be able to change. Once a week for 20 weeks I've been working with a group of 30 kids in the projects of Prince George's County. They have been my source for many a beer I've drank, laughs, and even a couple blog entries. You spend that much time with children there are bound to be some form of attachment to them and vice versa. You want it to be an attachment of great things happening in their lives: "Great report card, Monica!" "You got the lead role in the school play? Cool." But Unfortunately, life doesn't work like that. There are hurdles and obstacles in the path of growth. If we are lucky, those obstacles happen when we are an age to be resourceful enough to take all things in stride. Unfortunately, some of us are not that blessed. Some of us have to be parents to our parents.
Our program is almost a family affair. We have so many kids because there are a few brother-sister combinations. Yesterday I was told that one of the combos got evicted from their apartment. That blows me. How the fuck you gonna get put out of a Section 8 apartment? The rent is only like $50 a month! The whole situation was fucked up. The rumor was they were put out without notice. I'm sure they were way behind on rent though. Not that they were so poor, its that the parents were so fucked up. They are drug addicts. They decided to consolidate themselves and have 3 adults and 6 children in a goddamn apartment. That's some shit. Now, thier kids are in a shelter and since one of them is close to 12, HE probably will end up in foster care. For those who know me, you know I'm a pretty testosterone driven man. But this situation had a brother choked up for a minute. I guess because of the whole unjustness of the thing. These don't want to do anything but go to school and play. That's it! And now they have to be punished for the stupidity of their parents. And me, I think about the intangibles of the thing. Not the fact that they are in a damn shelter, but "who is going to braid S___e's hair? How is this going to effect D____e? Are T____e's grades going to take a nosedive?"

I apologize for this blog because I know most of you come here for something funny to read. I ain't got nothing for you and even if I did this is so huge that not too much of anything is going to be amusing.


Blonde Ambition said...

Damn...that got me all teary eyed too....and you know how I am and you know how I am about the kids I teach....I do so understand.....sending long distance hugs for you and those precious kids.....


chaparritadeoro said...

I'm sorry. You've worked so hard with those kids. I know it hurts you. I've told you that you're spreading yourself thin right now, but is there any way you can keep in contact with them? You and that program might be the one thing that they really need right now. At least the older ones. Again, I'm sorry.