Saturday, October 15, 2005

Adventures in Homophobia

In the Brother Kojak News....
This baseball thing seems to be picking up steam. Things are happening in the positive direction and its very exciting. I observe that one of my shortcomings is my belief in people based on race. It amazes me that I, a black man, and the leader of white men. One top of that, so far I'm the only brother on the team. Even MORE amazing than that, I'm the only one that thinks its a big deal. I share this thought with others and the reaction is "Oh. I guess you're right." That tells me a couple things; our society has come further than I think or I'm more of a natural leader (in general) than I thought.

One of my weaknesses is what our society calls homophobia. I am not afraid of homosexuals, it just freaks me out to see a man all up on a man or a man happily dressed like a woman. Wow. I'll never understand that. Women....are the bomb. Especially when they...

Mmm. Anyway, my cousin is having a costume party and when she told me some of her gay couple friends would be there, I double-taked. Immediately, I thought of who would go with me to run interference given that Mrs. Kojak would be working. Hmmm....

Candidates?
**crickets chirping in the background.**
I ask my friend Renaissance to come with me as Mrs. T (the party theme is the 80's and Mr. and Mrs. T was a classic Saturday Night Live spoof). No dice, lesbians either love her or hate so that no need in anybody getting their ass kicked.

I told CrazyHair about the party, and she and some of her crew are with it. Huge sigh of relief. Proof of my "homophobia" is this IM chat with my man Zoph!.

Conversation with whereiszoph

brotherkojak: oh boy....(after reading his intro)
brotherkojak: you are totally GONE!
brotherkojak: I have a question for you
Zoph!: geez... everybody is messaging me all at once
Zoph!: gone?
brotherkojak: smitten
Zoph!: I didn't do it
brotherkojak: oh! I was about to say!
brotherkojak: everything alright up there?
Zoph!: yeah... a little hectic
Zoph!: trying to get back into homework and all that
Zoph!: books coming a little late
Zoph!: still need one
Zoph!: oddly enough... the cheapest one
brotherkojak: damn that sucks
Zoph!: I guess....
Zoph!: need to get more sleep this weekend than last
brotherkojak: lol. u party?
Zoph!: unfortunately, not yet
Zoph!: they're still doing odds and ends around the apartment... that's a pain... the one manager is really pissed at the other one for taking so long
brotherkojak: not yet...sounds like u gonna have 2 wait homeboy
Zoph!: 3 Halloween parties coming up at the end of the month
brotherkojak: KOOL
brotherkojak: i have 1 to go to, but my cousin is throwing it and she just happens to be gay.
Zoph!: should be.... interesting
brotherkojak: man please
Zoph!: gay guys are good guys though... I know 2
Zoph!: music education and architect
brotherkojak: this 1 couple (2 dudes) are coming as Peaches And Herb
brotherkojak: (old school..look it up)
Zoph!: mmmm yeah... before my time
brotherkojak: lol
Zoph!: which one is going to be peaches?
brotherkojak: shit! who cares!
brotherkojak: its 2 dudes!!!
brotherkojak: if I go, I'm going as Mr.T.
Zoph!: I was thinking about doing that for 'ween as a joke
brotherkojak: you should do it!
Zoph!: that or Jack the Pumpkin King from The Nightmare Before Christmas
brotherkojak: i missed that one
Zoph!: I need to find lots of gaudy rings and jewelry though.... if I'm going to be Mr. T
Zoph!: the mohawk is easy
brotherkojak: ditto
brotherkojak: lol....I have to be creative with my mohawk
Zoph!: you'll be the rastafarian Mr. T
brotherkojak: LOL!! right right
brotherkojak: "I pity the fool!...mon"
Zoph!: ha
brotherkojak: gotta go. I'll see you at the Million Man Movement

2 comments:

Salsa Lover said...

Mr. T was my hero growing up... I used to have his 'action' figure and I get in trouble because I actually do call people 'fool' and they get pissed.

Brother Kojak said...

I won't go THAT damn far, but he was interesting to say the least. And why is it that people get so pissed when you call them "fool"? I think its because when you call someone "fool" you calling them out on their dumbness.

Yeah, yeah, that's it.