I'm going to make this short as possible as my ass is tired. Not from work mind you, but thinking about all of the stuff I'm SUPPOSED to be doing instead of this blog. **rolling eyes**
Good day today....didnt have to sub, got to stay in my office the whole time. I completed a work assignment nice and early. I ran into a faux paus as my soon-to-be ex decided she wanted to work this evening. I had to drive the 30 to get the offspring. When I got back, he told me he was hungry and the only thing cooked was ultra-healthy stir fry and black rice. Keep in mind this is a modern 7 yr old, so that shit just wouldnt do.
So I went to the store to get him something to eat at the closest Jamaican eatery. Man they took a long time! And I have about as much patience as George Bush has social etiquette. So when it was time to get my order, I approached the counter. The waitress said "we don't have any more beef patties....with your cute self". She smiled. I smiled and blushed (if that is physically possible). We adjusted the order, and as I was about to leave she said "Wait. Hold up." I obliged. She held out in front of me my receipt; on the back of it a name and number. "Take or leave it" she smiled........
Monday, November 29, 2004
Saturday, November 27, 2004
Dedicated to Tom and Dem II
I’m just being silly. So we adults made tiny plates for ourselves while the kids played. We talked amongst ourselves and were later joined by CalientePrima, Silly’s HOT cousin who happened to sit next to me. Now, I’m the kind of man where if you sit next to me, and give the laugh with the pat on the shoulder, or sit so close that our legs have continuous incidental contact, I’m going to think you’re interested. But I was told by WhatAboutMe that she only digs the Dominican brothas. I don’t have enough sazon in the blood for her tastes. So that was a question mark most of the night in my brain. So much so that I had to sit somewhere else to force the issue of her not being interested. Given the state of my marriage and my level of poverty, a date is nowhere in the near future. I’ll get back to the marriage issue on a slow blog day.
Later into the night after swearing off alcohol, I went ahead and had some wine. ( I wasn’t going to drink because I usually drink beer and beer is mucus forming. Currently I’m fighting some type of respiratory infection.) I was warned by Silly that HISYPOTI’s dad likes to get his guests lit. I made the mistake of asking him for the wine. Here’s the convo:
Papi: What are you looking for?
Me: The wine….vino.
Papi: Ahhhh!! El vino. Esta ahi.
Me: Ok, cool. Gracias. (He pours) Whoa! That’s enough.
Papi: Oh, but there is only a little in the bottle. Why don’t you drink?
Me: Nah. Save that for later. I’ll…uh..be back.
Papi: Ok. I save this for you.
Me: Gracias Papi.
Papi: Happy…(thinking about it) Thanksgiving Day!
Me: Si, Feliz El Dia de Gracias!
Papi: Si!
So I drink my drink, and dance with the Birthday Girl. (Yes, it was a Birthday/Thanksgiving affair) She was shocked that I knew how to dance bachata. “Where are you from?”
“Oh, I’m American. (pause) I’m just very well rounded.” Then I flashed her the killer smile. Force of habit. So after the dance I sit down next to CaleintePrima. Let’s just say I’m a glutton for punishment. Then I get a tap on the shoulder:
Papi: Hey! I been looking for you! Here is your wine.
Me: Oh…uh…thanks.
Luckily, the wine wasn’t too strong. Just enough to make get up and dance more. HISYPOTI was telling CalientePrima something about my size and height in Spanish. Then she asked me what size shoe I wear. When I told her she said “OH!” and pulled me closer. Funny.
I don’t think I’ve ever stayed out that late for Thanksgiving before. I didn’t get back to my parents’ house until about 1:30 am. It was difficult at first, but with the help and love from my friends Silly and WhatAboutMe I was able to cope with the feelings of sadness and emptiness that went along with my first Thanksgiving without my family.
Later into the night after swearing off alcohol, I went ahead and had some wine. ( I wasn’t going to drink because I usually drink beer and beer is mucus forming. Currently I’m fighting some type of respiratory infection.) I was warned by Silly that HISYPOTI’s dad likes to get his guests lit. I made the mistake of asking him for the wine. Here’s the convo:
Papi: What are you looking for?
Me: The wine….vino.
Papi: Ahhhh!! El vino. Esta ahi.
Me: Ok, cool. Gracias. (He pours) Whoa! That’s enough.
Papi: Oh, but there is only a little in the bottle. Why don’t you drink?
Me: Nah. Save that for later. I’ll…uh..be back.
Papi: Ok. I save this for you.
Me: Gracias Papi.
Papi: Happy…(thinking about it) Thanksgiving Day!
Me: Si, Feliz El Dia de Gracias!
Papi: Si!
So I drink my drink, and dance with the Birthday Girl. (Yes, it was a Birthday/Thanksgiving affair) She was shocked that I knew how to dance bachata. “Where are you from?”
“Oh, I’m American. (pause) I’m just very well rounded.” Then I flashed her the killer smile. Force of habit. So after the dance I sit down next to CaleintePrima. Let’s just say I’m a glutton for punishment. Then I get a tap on the shoulder:
Papi: Hey! I been looking for you! Here is your wine.
Me: Oh…uh…thanks.
Luckily, the wine wasn’t too strong. Just enough to make get up and dance more. HISYPOTI was telling CalientePrima something about my size and height in Spanish. Then she asked me what size shoe I wear. When I told her she said “OH!” and pulled me closer. Funny.
I don’t think I’ve ever stayed out that late for Thanksgiving before. I didn’t get back to my parents’ house until about 1:30 am. It was difficult at first, but with the help and love from my friends Silly and WhatAboutMe I was able to cope with the feelings of sadness and emptiness that went along with my first Thanksgiving without my family.
Friday's Thanksgiving
My long-time friend WorldofThought invited me over his house for an alternative Thanksgiving feast. Apparently, he and his uncle's signals got crossed as far as who was going to cook on Thanksgiving. Uncle won out, so Thanksgiving II was on Friday. I took my son over there and we both had a great time. I reminisced while he played with WorldofThought's kids. I had not seen WorldofThought's parents in about 5 years so it was great to see them again. They had a huge influence on raising me whether they know it or not. My blood family members have referred to them as my Other Parents. We both except that title mutually. It was an odd feeling though, because even though it was the norm that my son and I were there together without my wife, it still felt weird not having her implicit presence there. It was very saddening and I was told today by a good friend that I need to forgive myself for all of the deceitful and selfish things I've done to my wife no matter how bad they were.
So what was I thankful for? I was thankful for seeing my Other Parents, thankful that my brother in life WorldofThought isn't and hasn't gone thru the dumb shit I'm going thru, I was thankful that there were happy, healthy people there who made me feel the same.
So what was I thankful for? I was thankful for seeing my Other Parents, thankful that my brother in life WorldofThought isn't and hasn't gone thru the dumb shit I'm going thru, I was thankful that there were happy, healthy people there who made me feel the same.
Dedicated to Tom Turkey and Dem
Tom got housed!!!! One day he’s in the yard, chilling with the other Turks, eatin’ good, fresh air, nice crib, clean water. Life is good, right?
Until that truck comes and scoops his ass and all the asses of his peeps up into a truck and Tom ended up on the dining room table featherless, headless, and the little pop-up thing they put in his chest so that the Thanksgiving novices know that his ass is done. I tell you what though; Tom was tender and juicy!
This was the first Thanksgiving without my wife and son. They had plans so I had to get some. Luckily, my homegirl (we will refer to her from here on out as WhatAboutMe) and our mutual friend (we will refer to her from here on out as Silly) invited me to tag along. I met everyone at Silly’s house where dinner was in the oven. Of course, I fussed. I’m a very fussing man. I would admit it if I was bitchy, but there is a difference. Fussy is entertaining and no one pays you any real attention. Bitchy is when fussy gets annoying.
Ok, so to distract myself I volunteered to go to the grocery store and Silly came along. We walk in of course, to the ridiculously long lines caused by the other procrastinators. So Silly’s idea was for me to stand in line while she gets the stuff. Kool. I stand there, and there are 2 20-Somethings at the checkout. 5 minutes later, Silly is back, and I’m still standing in the same spot.
“What’s going on?” Silly asks.
“I don’t know. These chics up here, man…”
At one point, the 2 girls stared at each other, the cashier; the cashier stared back, then at the man behind them…Finally, they walked out, but without groceries! Silly and I looked at each other. “Dayum!” she gasped. “I think I’ll hit the ATM so that doesn’t happen to us.”
When poor Tom was done we tore his ass up. I had all dark meat (of course) colored-people’s mac and cheese (folks, there is a difference. But that’s a whole blog in of itself), biscuits, and green beans. And to keep that warm fuzzy life-is beautiful vibe, we watched “Kill Bill”.
After “Kill Bill” we packed into the car and drove to HaventISeenYourPicOnTheInternet’s (HISYPOTI) parents’ house for round two. We get there and are seated at the table. Maybe it’s coincidental, but why was the colored-folks mac and cheese place RIGHT IN FRONT OF MY black ass???? Why not to anyone else around the table? Hmmmmm???
Until that truck comes and scoops his ass and all the asses of his peeps up into a truck and Tom ended up on the dining room table featherless, headless, and the little pop-up thing they put in his chest so that the Thanksgiving novices know that his ass is done. I tell you what though; Tom was tender and juicy!
This was the first Thanksgiving without my wife and son. They had plans so I had to get some. Luckily, my homegirl (we will refer to her from here on out as WhatAboutMe) and our mutual friend (we will refer to her from here on out as Silly) invited me to tag along. I met everyone at Silly’s house where dinner was in the oven. Of course, I fussed. I’m a very fussing man. I would admit it if I was bitchy, but there is a difference. Fussy is entertaining and no one pays you any real attention. Bitchy is when fussy gets annoying.
Ok, so to distract myself I volunteered to go to the grocery store and Silly came along. We walk in of course, to the ridiculously long lines caused by the other procrastinators. So Silly’s idea was for me to stand in line while she gets the stuff. Kool. I stand there, and there are 2 20-Somethings at the checkout. 5 minutes later, Silly is back, and I’m still standing in the same spot.
“What’s going on?” Silly asks.
“I don’t know. These chics up here, man…”
At one point, the 2 girls stared at each other, the cashier; the cashier stared back, then at the man behind them…Finally, they walked out, but without groceries! Silly and I looked at each other. “Dayum!” she gasped. “I think I’ll hit the ATM so that doesn’t happen to us.”
When poor Tom was done we tore his ass up. I had all dark meat (of course) colored-people’s mac and cheese (folks, there is a difference. But that’s a whole blog in of itself), biscuits, and green beans. And to keep that warm fuzzy life-is beautiful vibe, we watched “Kill Bill”.
After “Kill Bill” we packed into the car and drove to HaventISeenYourPicOnTheInternet’s (HISYPOTI) parents’ house for round two. We get there and are seated at the table. Maybe it’s coincidental, but why was the colored-folks mac and cheese place RIGHT IN FRONT OF MY black ass???? Why not to anyone else around the table? Hmmmmm???
Sunday, November 21, 2004
Cub Scout Spirit
Today is a day for chilling. I don't any better way to relax than waking up on Sunday during football season. I get up, do chores, watch pre-game shows, and then the main events. I think the only thing better than that would be to have all of that, wake up with a beautiful woman lying next to you, and NOT having to do those chores because you are vacationing. **sigh**
But thats not the case today. Today the Cub Scouts are going to rake leaves for elder families. We had a surprisingly large turn-out minus the dads who were glued to the tv sets for the game. Damn I was jealous.
I was jealous, but not for long. Raking those leaves made me think about a lot of things. We had fun and it was tough keeping the kids focused, but they helped too. The hard work and fun kept me from thinking too too much. Things that I thought about; the fact that my son wasn't there with me hurt because it was my fault. The fact that some of the things I've done to someone else have ripped them from the inside out. And here I am, using one of my favorite days of the week to do a good deed for someone I don't even know. The epitome of an oxymoron.
But thats not the case today. Today the Cub Scouts are going to rake leaves for elder families. We had a surprisingly large turn-out minus the dads who were glued to the tv sets for the game. Damn I was jealous.
I was jealous, but not for long. Raking those leaves made me think about a lot of things. We had fun and it was tough keeping the kids focused, but they helped too. The hard work and fun kept me from thinking too too much. Things that I thought about; the fact that my son wasn't there with me hurt because it was my fault. The fact that some of the things I've done to someone else have ripped them from the inside out. And here I am, using one of my favorite days of the week to do a good deed for someone I don't even know. The epitome of an oxymoron.
Saturday, November 20, 2004
Saturday
Life is an ass-cramp when things arent going the way you want them too. Its one thing when "shit happens", its another when you doing the wrong thing and the consequences are the exactly how you thought they would be.
Its Sat., I'm chilling at the house, just waiting for the day to...evolve. I was supposed to be making a website with a friend, but I think her boyfriend has her tied up, literally. I'm supposed to be studying with my friend The Spanish (sorry, but its easier to nickname folks in improvised ebonics) , but her boyfriend had her tied up last night, literally.
So, now I'm just chilling going to watch a football game or 2 and work on the website myself.
I have a rant brewing in my head, but I'm waiting for it to fully simmer saute. I shall return.....
.......Damn. I lost the rant. One thing thats on my mind is the fear of being single again. Under different circumstances, it might be cool. But now 30+ , 1 kid, substantially underpaid, and semi-nomadic, I definitetly dont rise to the top as a great catch. No, I'm not feeling sorry for myself. You make your bed you have to sleep in it. I just have the worst feeling that my future dates are going to consist of convos like this:
"Oh! You back again, huh?"
"Yeah, you hooked me up last week. Just got paid too. You got change for a $50?"
Its Sat., I'm chilling at the house, just waiting for the day to...evolve. I was supposed to be making a website with a friend, but I think her boyfriend has her tied up, literally. I'm supposed to be studying with my friend The Spanish (sorry, but its easier to nickname folks in improvised ebonics) , but her boyfriend had her tied up last night, literally.
So, now I'm just chilling going to watch a football game or 2 and work on the website myself.
I have a rant brewing in my head, but I'm waiting for it to fully simmer saute. I shall return.....
.......Damn. I lost the rant. One thing thats on my mind is the fear of being single again. Under different circumstances, it might be cool. But now 30+ , 1 kid, substantially underpaid, and semi-nomadic, I definitetly dont rise to the top as a great catch. No, I'm not feeling sorry for myself. You make your bed you have to sleep in it. I just have the worst feeling that my future dates are going to consist of convos like this:
"Oh! You back again, huh?"
"Yeah, you hooked me up last week. Just got paid too. You got change for a $50?"
Friday, November 19, 2004
Nite at the Love Cafe
Yes, I was among the bloggers who made it out to the Love Cafe last night. I missed a good portion of the festivities. When I got there there was a blogger reading one of his works and I just wanted to go to him and say "Brother, the womenz have got your balls in a jar. Stop being the girlfriend with the penis!" But the Mrs. was with me with a growling stomach so we parlayed down U St. We proceeded to the Cada Vez, a restaurant/lounge/bar/conference room that usually has decent food and entertainment. Well, the entertainment was implied. Let me explain....we walked into the spot, and me being familiar with the place I knew something was going on as the front counter covered the visibility of the restaurant. When we approached closer an amazon of a woman smiled at us "May I help you?"
"Wait a minute," I thought. A took a closer look. Hmmmmm......
"Whats going on here?" I asked.
"It's a...errr....'banquet' she smiled.
"oh ok. Thanks anyway."
We stepped back on the sidewalk and I looked at my wife. "Notice anything funny about the hostess?"
She suppressed a grin because she knew I was going to say something crazy. "What?"
And in my best Austin Powers voice, "That was a maaan baby!"
She laughed. "For real?"
"Yeah that was a man! His voice was lower than mine and shit!"
Then, out of the God-forsaken Blue, this brotha who I've never met in my life walking the opposite direction says "No it wasn't!"
"Yes it was!" I cried.
"Huh? For real? In there??" he asked pointing in the Cada Vez.
I said "Hell yeah! Go see for yourself and YOU tell ME that aint a dude."
He shrugged his shoulders and walked off.
My wife and I strolled down the block and FINALLY picked a restaurant. It was an odd experience for me because my buddy and I would rely heavily on getting a table at the Cafe Nema back in the day. Now, U St. has Starbucks, Subway, and other commercialized favorites. **sigh**
On the way back we approached the Cada Vez. Fortunately for us, the festivities were just ending and all of the "gals" were exiting the spot. I'd say that at least half of them were 5'10 or so. AND wearing heels gracefully. I was impressed. "I don't give a damn what she said! I'm a big girl now and I can handle anything that flow!" I heard one of them say.
Big girl indeed!
We continued to walk and as we passed the doors, one of the spot's workers said (as if we asked him) "Not every night...some nights, but not every night."
For the next 2 blocks, I couldn't get that Crystal Waters song out of my head:
she's just like you and me
but she's homeless
she's homeless
as she sits there, begging for money
dada de, dada da
dada de, dada da
dada de, dada da
dada de, dada da
"Wait a minute," I thought. A took a closer look. Hmmmmm......
"Whats going on here?" I asked.
"It's a...errr....'banquet' she smiled.
"oh ok. Thanks anyway."
We stepped back on the sidewalk and I looked at my wife. "Notice anything funny about the hostess?"
She suppressed a grin because she knew I was going to say something crazy. "What?"
And in my best Austin Powers voice, "That was a maaan baby!"
She laughed. "For real?"
"Yeah that was a man! His voice was lower than mine and shit!"
Then, out of the God-forsaken Blue, this brotha who I've never met in my life walking the opposite direction says "No it wasn't!"
"Yes it was!" I cried.
"Huh? For real? In there??" he asked pointing in the Cada Vez.
I said "Hell yeah! Go see for yourself and YOU tell ME that aint a dude."
He shrugged his shoulders and walked off.
My wife and I strolled down the block and FINALLY picked a restaurant. It was an odd experience for me because my buddy and I would rely heavily on getting a table at the Cafe Nema back in the day. Now, U St. has Starbucks, Subway, and other commercialized favorites. **sigh**
On the way back we approached the Cada Vez. Fortunately for us, the festivities were just ending and all of the "gals" were exiting the spot. I'd say that at least half of them were 5'10 or so. AND wearing heels gracefully. I was impressed. "I don't give a damn what she said! I'm a big girl now and I can handle anything that flow!" I heard one of them say.
Big girl indeed!
We continued to walk and as we passed the doors, one of the spot's workers said (as if we asked him) "Not every night...some nights, but not every night."
For the next 2 blocks, I couldn't get that Crystal Waters song out of my head:
she's just like you and me
but she's homeless
she's homeless
as she sits there, begging for money
dada de, dada da
dada de, dada da
dada de, dada da
dada de, dada da
Wednesday, November 17, 2004
Tues
Tues is my long day. I go to work, hang at my moms for a minute, then go work at the community project. What we are doing is producing an anti-smoking video for kids. Actually, the kids are doing all of the production, we adults are just guiding them and helping them stay focused. After that, I went to DC to the U St area to go to a Hip Hop Alliance meeting. This org. is trying to get DC hip hop on the map. Its very exciting to feel that energy come together. However, there was no meeting tonite because there were a few no-shows. So the 12 or so of us just kinda hung out.Now, here it is 5 something in the goddam morning and I cant sleep. I guess Im stressing this paper that is due today that I thought was due next Wed. **sigh**grumble of the day: I have this shirt, I call it my guido shirt. (yes, thats a bit of a racist statement so to my reader of Italian descent, I hope you arent offended) It looks like a shirt Big Pussy (dont you just love saying that???) would wear. All white with a baby blue collar and baby blue stripes going down the chest. Pretty much the anti-thesis of what a typical dredded brotha like myself would wear. Man....that shirt is ruined now! I have no idea how, but everytime I wash it, weird brown spots appear on it. They look like grease stains, but they wont come out. My last ditch..... the Korean Lady. Which Korean Lady I dont know, but she gonna HAVE TO run a dry cleaning spot of some sort.Korean Lady...Im putting my trust in you. You can say "FI-NINETY-FI" ($5.95) all you want, but please. Just fix my shit.
Tuesdays
Tues is my long day. I go to work (the next time I can remember, I'll talk about work), hang at my moms for a minute, then go work at the community project. What we are doing is producing an anti-smoking video for kids. Actually, the kids are doing all of the production, we adults are just guiding them and helping them stay focused. After that, I went to DC to the U St area to go to a Hip Hop Alliance meeting. This org. is trying to get DC hip hop on the map. Its very exciting to feel that energy come together. However, there was no meeting tonite because there were a few no-shows. So the 12 or so of us just kinda hung out.
Now, here it is 5 something in the goddam morning and I cant sleep. I guess I'm stressing this paper that is due today that I thought was due next Wed. **sigh**
grumble of the day: I have this shirt, I call it my guido shirt. (yes, thats a bit of a racist statement so to my readers of Italian descent, I hope you arent offended) It looks like a shirt Big Pussy (dont you just love saying that???) would wear. All white with a baby blue collar and baby blue stripes going down the chest. Pretty much the antithesis of what a typical dredded brotha like myself would wear. I love it.
Man....that shirt is ruined now! I have no idea how, but everytime I wash it, weird brown spots appear on it. They look like grease stains, but they wont come out. My last ditch..... the Korean Lady. Which Korean Lady I dont know, but she gonna HAVE TO run a dry cleaning spot of some sort.
Korean Lady...I'm putting my trust in you. You can say "FI-NINETY-FI" ($5.95) all you want, but please. Just fix my shit.
Now, here it is 5 something in the goddam morning and I cant sleep. I guess I'm stressing this paper that is due today that I thought was due next Wed. **sigh**
grumble of the day: I have this shirt, I call it my guido shirt. (yes, thats a bit of a racist statement so to my readers of Italian descent, I hope you arent offended) It looks like a shirt Big Pussy (dont you just love saying that???) would wear. All white with a baby blue collar and baby blue stripes going down the chest. Pretty much the antithesis of what a typical dredded brotha like myself would wear. I love it.
Man....that shirt is ruined now! I have no idea how, but everytime I wash it, weird brown spots appear on it. They look like grease stains, but they wont come out. My last ditch..... the Korean Lady. Which Korean Lady I dont know, but she gonna HAVE TO run a dry cleaning spot of some sort.
Korean Lady...I'm putting my trust in you. You can say "FI-NINETY-FI" ($5.95) all you want, but please. Just fix my shit.
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